Sweet Girls

My grandmother once said that she would rather I be sweet and mentally retarded than be smart and arrogant.

The concept of “sweetness” is one that is oppressive to people, especially women. I strive to be polite, pleasant, hospitable, generous, but never sweet!

Sweet girls are submissive and inoffensive. Sweet girls never speak their minds. Sweet girls never contradict anyone. Sweet girls never question. Sweet girls never talk about anything more substantial than the weather or fashion or boyfriends. Sweet girls go to church. Sweet girls, if they have any brains, don’t show them. Sweet girls respect authority. Sweet girls speak softly. Sweet girls never get mad. Sweet girls are ladylike. Sweet girls do what their families tell them, even when they’re not girls anymore. Sweet girls get married. Sweet girls have babies. Sweet girls aren’t activists. Sweet girls aren’t political. Sweet girls don’t have opinions. Sweet girls don’t have personalities. Sweet girls don’t have emotions, except for the warm and fuzzy kind. Sweet girls sacrifice. Sweet girls exist only for others. Sweet girls have no self.

I AM NOT A SWEET GIRL!!!

The Future of this Blog

I haven’t posted in forever, and I’ve really been thinking about the future of this blog. The plural part of Atheist Girls hasn’t been true for a while. I bear no ill will toward Philosophychick or thegecko, as they have busy lives. Philosophychick is starting a Master’s program as well as planning a wedding. Thegecko has a new job and various responsibilities. I doubt they will write here anymore.

I am entering the last phase of my Master’s program. That doesn’t leave me a lot of time to write, although long days in the lab waiting on experiments to finish (while having the laptop handy) might lead to some posts. There is also the issue of motivation. When I began this blog, I was not a new atheist, but I was a newly inspired atheist activist. I was also closeted and needed a place to vent. The blog is no longer useful for venting because of 2 reasons: One, that my family now knows about it and reads it, and two, that I can pick up the phone and vent at any time to my wonderful boyfriend, one of the coolest atheists in the world, Matt Dillahunty of the Atheist Experience. Whereas I used to write blog posts in anger and frustration, now I just talk it out with him. This is good for my mental health, but not so good for the blog. I also read so many good blogs, like Pharyngula, Friendly Atheist, Skepchick, and others. Among all those, they touch on almost every subject that I could hope to talk about, and usually more eloquently than I could hope to say it.

I wrote this to have something to put on here for the summer. Maybe I will get inspired again, maybe I won’t. Since I'm not psychic (if I was, I would be out spending my million dollars), we'll just have to see what the future holds. In any case, the other girls and I didn’t drop off the face of the earth, we’re still alive, happy, and atheist!

I'm going to TAM 7

Hey Everyone!

Sorry I haven't been posting, but I've been really busy. One of the things I've been busy doing is getting ready for TAM 7.

I will be in Las Vegas in 11 hours!!!

Ray Comfort's Book

I received 2 books in the mail today, "You can Lead an Atheist to Evidence, but You can't Make Him Think," and "The Atheist Bible."

These were given free of charge by Ray Comfort's Living Waters Ministries and the "Evidence" book is autographed. I thank Ray for giving these out, and I will read it thoroughly...and then rip it apart here. :)

Another Accidental Outing

I empathize with Everything Else Atheist and her story of being outed.

Let this be a lesson to closeted atheists everywhere: You can't hide forever. I had elaborate security protocols, and it seemed that EEA did as well, but a conscious or unconscious desire to not live a lie led to the leaking of small details that eventually led to the full outing.

The best advice I can give other atheists going through this process is to let your family know you still love them, remember that they are responsible for their own reactions, and seek support from the atheist community, especially people who have gone through this before.

Post Outing

As some of you may have noticed, I restricted the blog for a time after my outing. This was due to my family finding my blog. They actually read all the posts before it was blocked, so it was ultimately unnecessary. I have reread my posts and have decided to let the blog stand. Most of their objections had nothing to do with what was actually written, but was about what they read into it.

Currently, relationships with my family are strained. I got through Easter with little comment, having had long conversations with various family members the previous day. They are very upset and disapproving, of course. I am sorry that they feel that way, but I do not apologize for being myself. While it was hard to deal with their feelings, I am relieved to not be living a lie anymore. While I was not pleased about the timing or the method by which I was outed, I believe it may have been for the greater good. As I matured, I was drifting away from my family anyway, and I feel this forced my hand to become a truly independent adult.

So for the time being, the blog will be open and posts will continue when I have time to do them. There will not be many posts about family issues because they know about the blog now.

Thanks, loyal readers, for sticking around and supporting me through this!

I've been outed!!!!!

My grandmother fucking googled me and found some pictures of me at the Godless Pub Crawl.

All hell is breaking loose.

Details to follow at some point...